I don’t know when Fall officially begins and I’m far too lazy to google it. But what I do know is that you can buy your cat some devil ears for his Halloween costume at Target and order a Pumpkin Spice Latte at Starbucks, so it must be Fall. Yes, I base season beginnings on store offerings versus actual official dates chosen by God or some scientist. Or worse — a politician. 😀 It’s not completely my fault either. LA is fairly season-less. I mean in Minnesota you knew it was winter when it was 80 below and a whiteout.
I’m in a mood. A silly mood. Okay, not really. I’m actually feeling grumpy but I want to feel silly and lighthearted and goofy. Grumpy Cat may amuse me, although Max is still the feline that reigns supreme around here, I don’t like being cranky. So whenever I turn grumpy and no one wants to listen to me whine about dumb stuff (like Max puking last Saturday), I go to Pinterest and look at animals and memes. Obviously, I am easily amused.
Do you remember The Secret by Rhonda Byrnes from a few years back? The idea that you could visualize something amazing (or to be fair, bad) into existence by your mere thoughts was a powerful, enticing notion. It was A Field of Dreams come to life! Some bought into the hype; others did not. I fell into the middle because I do believe to a certain extent that what we choose to focus on — abundance or lack — is what we simultaneously create in our lives. In other words, we see what we expect to see.
I wasn’t going to post today, even though Thursday is my post day. I woke up in a bad mood on Wednesday for no good reason. Nothing bad happened. I had not watched or read the news, so beyond my normal general irritation with Emperor Baby Fists, I wasn’t in hulk-mode yet. But I felt off. Quietly blue and a little sad. With zero energy or interest in writing a post.
Today, we’re meeting for coffee, just the two of us. Let’s get comfy in some oversized, plush chairs with our large porcelain mugs of piping hot java and settle in for a long conversation about nothing. About everything. Those are the best conversations, right? I decided to “borrow” this idea from Audrey. After all, some days all you want to do is share a stream of random thoughts. Over coffee. Lots and lots of coffee.
Tomorrow someone that I abhor and stands for everything I despise — racism, xenophobia, sexism, homophobia, greed and bullying — is going to become our President. In my lowest moments, I feel sick, frightened and hopeless. My anxiety levels are off the charts given my gloomy view of the future. And yet … I keep marching forward because I am not a quitter. Silence or bowing down are not options for me, so I will fight instead.