42 Reflections (aka 1 More than Last Year)

Yup, it’s that time again. Tanya turns another year older this week (technically on Thursday) and I feel a tad nostalgic, a little wiser and a bit more achy than I care to admit. Listen, people: This getting old thing is serious, serious business. It’s not for the faint of heart or weak of knees. My knees ain’t weak but they do creak, nor is my heart faint, although it does burn more frequently than it did previously. 😀

42 Reflections, Deep Thoughts and Musings

Last year I shared 41 lessons for my birthday and I will likely repeat myself fairly often. Why? Because I’m old and forgetful. And I also didn’t learn 42 new lessons this year. Or at least that this old coot can recall. Good gracious, I make getting old sound so damn glamorous!

1. I’d tell my younger self (and also my current self) to stop sweating the little things. Relax. Chill out. This isn’t permission to YOLO and go nuts. But I agonized over lots of stupid, meaningless stuff. And all it did was take up energy and time. Two things you really value as you age.
2. You can never stop and say thanks enough times. Say it now. Say it often. And most importantly, mean it every time you say it.
3. Cats rule. I’m pretty sure I was put on this earth to enable and indulge my feline companions (aka kids). I’m also okay with this.
4. You should never, ever, wear elastic waist-band pants as your every day, all day pants. Yoga pants may feel great but you will be doing fat dogs versus sleeping dogs, if you’re not careful.
5. Your parents were right more often than you will ever care to admit, especially to them.
6. It’s unfairly easy to pack on weight and unfairly hard to rid yourself of those excess pounds. The good news is that you also start to feel strong and proud as you do lose weight, even if it is slow going.
7. You will fail. I will fail. Everyone will fail. No one is immune to failure, no matter what they tell you.
8. But don’t give up because you failed either. What makes a person stand apart is not that they never failed (that person is a unicorn) but that you got back up and kept going.
9. Hate and fear are not only what keeps America from being great but also us on an individual level.
10. Love is love, is love, is love, is love.
11. Some days you forget your true age because you still feel 25 and can’t believe your 25th high school reunion is next year.
12. Some days you almost fall flat on your face because you sat too long and your legs are stiff and sore.
13. Life is meant to be enjoyed, which differs from person-to-person, but don’t sit on the sidelines. Figure out what brings you joy and do it (mindfully, of course!)
14. You are braver than you imagined. So much braver.
15. Everyone has light inside of them. How brightly it shines is up to you.
16. Coffee is the drink of champions.
17. Hangry is real. Very, very real. And very, very dangerous.
18. FOMO is also very real and costly. Plus, frequently stupid. So figure out what brings out your FOMO response so you can manage it. Otherwise you will spend lots of money on crap and yes, even experiences, that ultimately mean very little to you.
19. No one can survive alone on an island. Find your tribe, squad, community, BFFs of like-minded souls. It doesn’t have to be a big crew but just strong and pure.
20. It’s okay to admit you don’t know the answer. Or are even, gasp, wrong.
21. Asking for help does not make you weak. It makes you strong.
22. Bucket lists are a struggle for me. I understand their purpose but they hold a lot of pressure and judgment within them.
23. Books are my happy place, especially if a purring cat snuggles up next to me.
24. I get jealous. This doesn’t make me proud but it’s true. And being honest about my jealousy keeps it from eating me up.
25. Complacency is the killer of dreams, even more so than fear.
26. Feminists don’t hate men or the color pink or girlie things. I know this because I am a feminist and I like men, pink and girlie things. Nor do feminists necessarily like men, pink or girlie things. What feminists hate is sexism, misogyny (although I can never spell it correctly the first time) and inequality.
27. Self care is one of the most important things you can do for yourself. It’s not being selfish. It’s honoring your self-worth and well-being.
28. I like shoes. I like purses. I like clothes. I like spas. This does not make me bad with my money or a frivolous spender. It means I know where I like to spend my discretionary money, which does not need your approval.
29. Love should never be feared or hoarded but celebrated. Tell your loved ones that you love them frequently. It’s the best drug in the world.
30. I once tried on a pair of 5 inch heels and promptly fell into a shelf of shoes. I decided to stick with flip-flops.
31. I sprained my ankle twice, tripping over a pile of shoes. I still don’t put them away. And I say that I’m not a risk-taker!
32. My website must be neat and orderly and I will spend hours tweaking an image or lining up something up so it’s just perfect. My house? Not so much.
33. I remain supremely disappointed that The Jetson’s lifestyle has not come to fruition. The aforementioned house would be spotless if I had a robot cleaning up after me.
34. A genuine belly laugh is a daily requirement. Most come from chasing after Max.
35. You can find an excuse to not do anything. You can also find an excuse to do it too.
36. You are kind. You are smart. You are capable.
37. When you find something that works for you, keep doing it. Versus saying “Yay! I found something that works” and then quit doing it.
38. Sometimes the right thing to do is to eat dessert first.
39. Put yourself in somebody else’s shoes. You don’t have to stay there but understanding why someone believes something is critical to influencing them.
40. Sometimes I believe the purpose of life is to find purpose and know that there is no right answer and that purpose can evolve over time.
41. Dream big. Have faith. Be kind. And take action.
42. I am proud of me. You should be proud of you too.

Happy Birthday to Me

I went through a period where birthdays meant a lot, then meant little and now I’m back to enjoying them again. I appreciate every day on this earth. Not every moment is great (some are quite terrible in fact) but they form my life, which is a very good life.

What are some of your best life lessons or deep thoughts?

Tanya

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